I always start a story for my 1yr old daughter this way “Once upon a time, in a kingdom far far away, there lived a little angel. Little angel had many many friends but her best friend was,...drumroll... Daddy!” And after a lot of twists and turns and drama, I would end it this way “…and they were so happy that little angel is there for them and they lived happily ever after. The End” I take great pride in my story telling abilities but they are purely based on my daughter’s reaction and take no account of the immense ridiculing by my wife.
So I am going to put my story telling ability to test here…but it is not a children story and it is PG 13…there are no angels or fairies or witches in this story…so here it goes.
Once upon a time, in a city far far away (at least from here it is), there lived a teenager. The teenager had many many friends (ok, not so many) but his best friend was…Well, that is not important. Moving on… Ok, I am sensing I am not doing so well…yet. Just wait, it gets better. And besides I am unable to give the hand gestures and funny voice that I use with my daughter.
Every day the boy and his friends would walk on the streets of this city and be very curiously amazed and get a serious rush of their-teenage-hormones looking at the not so subtle “A” rated posters on the wall. They would wonder how one could get into one of these movie theaters. There were always rumors and hear-says about what was in these movies but they had never seen it themselves so had no idea if they were just rumors or had any truth to it.
They were 16 yrs old now. The boy and his friends decided they were old enough to make their own decisions and the decision they made was to check out one of these movies. It required a lot of courage, considerable planning and had to be done with total secrecy. If a word of this plan gets out, everything will be in jeopardy. You are talking about getting the punishment without even doing the crime. You would be forever seen as an A-movie-goer without having ever been to one. How terrible! So they came up with the plan. Firstly, they needed an alibi for the 3 hours because the movie theater had to be as far away as possible from anything that was even remotely related to anything to home. That ruled out most of the theaters in this city. Secondly, decide on the movie and timings. Now this wasn’t hard because once you ruled out most of the theaters, the choices were pretty slim. Finally, they needed a clear entry and exit strategy to and from the movie hall.
The movie they picked was Lady Terminator – Amazon link.
You can click; it is clean. The boy and his friends picked it because of the tremendous potential the poster displayed. They decided on the date and an entry-exit strategy which was pretty simple. Enter after movie has started; use the darkness and sneak into an open seat; exit out before the end of the movie; darkness used then as well. Also had a brilliant back up plan in case of being caught during this well planned entry and reentry – was in the neighborhood to buy books and was offered tickets by a friend who mysteriously vanished right then. One of the friends backs out. No, he said. I will not be part of this. I will suppress my curiosity and not be tempted by these sinful posters. So be it.
That left the boy and his friend…Two brave boys, into the darkness, to come out enlightened.
The day arrived. The boys make their way to the movie theater. Shut off the bike couple blocks before and push it through the complex. Park at a very discreet corner and even try to cover the plates with branches of a nearby tree. Yes, they had thought it all out. It was perfect! Now the boys were nervous but they couldn’t display it to anybody else. The ticket counter clerk wouldn’t sell tickets, they thought, if he sensed they were underage. The boys nervously walk in total confidence and demand two tickets. Done. Now that they were in possession of the tickets, they have to “hang out” somewhere and wait for the right time to make an entry into the dark movie hall. Tick tick tick…tock tock tock…Done.
They make entry into the dark movie theater. It is loud. Lot of gunfire and explosions. It is a good sign, they thought to themselves. The adrenaline rush from being secretive and from being on the verge of uncovering a teenage boy’s greatest mystery! Wow! They are unable to secure two adjacent seats except for the ones without a back rest. Hmm, they nodded and didn’t look any further. It must have been few minutes into the movie but their curiosity has only increased. There is still lot of gunfire and explosions. It might not be a good sign after all, they thought to themselves this time. Time passes…10 minutes…15…20….still nothing but a lot of shooting. Their curiosity is overtaken by nervousness, guilt, shame and fear! They are both thinking to themselves that this was a bad idea. They both wished they were some place else then. It must be 30 minutes into the movie when they both decided it was best to leave. Since they weren’t paying any attention to the story (if there was one), and it was just mindless gunfire, they had no idea when the movie would really end so it was safer to take off now.
The movie theater is still dark…still gunfire and explosions…pretty much the way they found it when they came in. The exit is also uneventful, as is rest of this whole plan. They make their way to the bike and the plates are still hidden by the tree branches. Identity is still concealed. Brilliant!
The boys were so relieved they got out of the theater without being caught. As they ride blocks and blocks away from the theater, they shed away all their nervousness, shame, guilt and shame. Their curiosity remains and it might appear to others that the plan was a disaster but they executed it perfectly. For they knew, that their plan was perfect and it was only the movie that slightly messed it up…
The boys are all grown up now but they haven’t forgotten about that afternoon. The plan. The theater. Lady Terminator. They are very happy they showed courage and executed an almost perfect plan. And they live happily ever after!
The end…
Tuesday, March 31, 2009
Friday, March 27, 2009
Stop counting....start living!
I will start this off by saying this can be a bit controversial but it is what it is…no offense to anybody.
When did we stop eating and start counting? Except for some references in science books, I never knew anything about counting calories in our food. And I didn’t know until 2001 or so.
When I started my masters at Utah, almost every night, my roommates and I would treat ourselves to strawberry milkshake. Very easy to make and this was how we did it. Vitamin D milk, big bucket of ice cream ($4), strawberry syrup, blender, big glass! I remember somebody stopping by, someone who had been in this country for few months more and had been institutionalized (borrowing one from Shawshank Redemption) with the calorie-counting mantra! He looks at it and goes “You guys have this every night?” We proudly declare, “heh, pretty much. Why you want some?” He takes a step back “what me? This is like a million calories?” Hmm…Million calories? (Our still-in-metric-system-brains going 10 lakhs…10 lakhs…6 zeroes…). He explains the label on the ice cream bucket, milk can and strawberry syrup. Wow! When you put it that way, it felt like I was chugging artery cloggers and had a death wish. And so it began…
Now I pick up a label and that’s what I am looking. I am not a calorie counter per se but that’s what I am looking. Why god, why? How is it possible that I didn’t do that for over 20 years and was just fine? But then, I used to eat at home and you always eat right at home or you are made to eat right. A good balanced diet…I suppose.
Weight loss is a multi-billion industry and the focus around calorie counting is huge. You switch on TV and you will be flooded with several weight loss commercials. Weight watchers, jenny craig, NutriSystem…Maybe it is the buzz this has created that has caused us to just count our way in pursuit of a healthy life.
I am against calorie counting. Hmm…let me put it this way. I will not go eat a big mac, milkshake and finish it off with a snickers bar. I am not stupid or irresponsible. But I will not bury all my taste buds and eat Kashi fiber cereal or Special K (and join the special K challenge) because honey bunches with almonds has like 200 calories more. The alternative I propose is exercise and being responsible (as mentioned above). I will not count calories in a 32 ounce steak. I will not flinch, I will not back out, I will not resist when I see that meat. I will go at it and I will give my taste buds a reason to exist. I am not at my ideal weight…yet. But I will proudly declare that I have lost 30 lbs not by counting calories. And I will thank my work out schedule for the perfect EKG graph last week...ending self-flattery!
We work hard for this life. And we deserve to live a LOT. Someone recently wrote this to me “We become numb to our daily routine and often forget what we need to feed our spirit.” How very well put. What is your need? One of my needs is to eat good food and not count calories , not worry about every grain or rice I swallow, not fret over every bite of chicken wings, not feel guilty over every scoop of ice cream…I will satisfy that need. I will run a mile to burn that scoop but I will satisfy that need.
So go have that donut you have been craving for. Go have that brownie you so wanted to eat. Go eat that sundae you have been dreaming about all month. Go feed those taste buds of yours. Go feed your spirit…but then go hit the gym or walk a mile or run a mile or walk to work or bike to work or take the stairs....
To a healthy life…and a healthy mind.
When did we stop eating and start counting? Except for some references in science books, I never knew anything about counting calories in our food. And I didn’t know until 2001 or so.
When I started my masters at Utah, almost every night, my roommates and I would treat ourselves to strawberry milkshake. Very easy to make and this was how we did it. Vitamin D milk, big bucket of ice cream ($4), strawberry syrup, blender, big glass! I remember somebody stopping by, someone who had been in this country for few months more and had been institutionalized (borrowing one from Shawshank Redemption) with the calorie-counting mantra! He looks at it and goes “You guys have this every night?” We proudly declare, “heh, pretty much. Why you want some?” He takes a step back “what me? This is like a million calories?” Hmm…Million calories? (Our still-in-metric-system-brains going 10 lakhs…10 lakhs…6 zeroes…). He explains the label on the ice cream bucket, milk can and strawberry syrup. Wow! When you put it that way, it felt like I was chugging artery cloggers and had a death wish. And so it began…
Now I pick up a label and that’s what I am looking. I am not a calorie counter per se but that’s what I am looking. Why god, why? How is it possible that I didn’t do that for over 20 years and was just fine? But then, I used to eat at home and you always eat right at home or you are made to eat right. A good balanced diet…I suppose.
Weight loss is a multi-billion industry and the focus around calorie counting is huge. You switch on TV and you will be flooded with several weight loss commercials. Weight watchers, jenny craig, NutriSystem…Maybe it is the buzz this has created that has caused us to just count our way in pursuit of a healthy life.
I am against calorie counting. Hmm…let me put it this way. I will not go eat a big mac, milkshake and finish it off with a snickers bar. I am not stupid or irresponsible. But I will not bury all my taste buds and eat Kashi fiber cereal or Special K (and join the special K challenge) because honey bunches with almonds has like 200 calories more. The alternative I propose is exercise and being responsible (as mentioned above). I will not count calories in a 32 ounce steak. I will not flinch, I will not back out, I will not resist when I see that meat. I will go at it and I will give my taste buds a reason to exist. I am not at my ideal weight…yet. But I will proudly declare that I have lost 30 lbs not by counting calories. And I will thank my work out schedule for the perfect EKG graph last week...ending self-flattery!
We work hard for this life. And we deserve to live a LOT. Someone recently wrote this to me “We become numb to our daily routine and often forget what we need to feed our spirit.” How very well put. What is your need? One of my needs is to eat good food and not count calories , not worry about every grain or rice I swallow, not fret over every bite of chicken wings, not feel guilty over every scoop of ice cream…I will satisfy that need. I will run a mile to burn that scoop but I will satisfy that need.
So go have that donut you have been craving for. Go have that brownie you so wanted to eat. Go eat that sundae you have been dreaming about all month. Go feed those taste buds of yours. Go feed your spirit…but then go hit the gym or walk a mile or run a mile or walk to work or bike to work or take the stairs....
To a healthy life…and a healthy mind.
Wednesday, March 25, 2009
Noise
Ever been in a meeting and wondered why you are there and what the heck you are doing there? Do you feel compelled to say something? Do you feel compelled to keep your mouth shut because you are afraid you will just be uhmmm…, Noise? Talk shows and cable news is just a lot of noise.
Yes, Noise.
Dr.Phil was on AC 360 the other day. I watch AC 360 podcast. It is not great but it is the only video podcast I can get of something I don’t hate. He is better than Lou Dobbs, Larry King, Wolf Blitzer…So anyway, Dr.Phil is on AC360 and Anderson Cooper has already mentioned it couple times that later in the show Dr.Phil is going to give some tips on how we can _thrive_ in this economy. Teeee Teeee Teee…My antennas go up…After few news briefs they break to commercial (which I don’t have to watch on podcast) and just before breaking again says Dr.Phil will share some ideas on how to thrive in this troubling economy. Oh come on, man! Come on!
I should have known better. Dr.Phil comes on air…says troubling economy is an opportunity for us to focus on other things. Like spending time with family, getting to know each other better and focusing on things outside the financial trouble. Ah, is it so? Says the dude making millions of dollars selling BS on television? I do not mean to disrespect any psychiatric treatment here but how is that not common knowledge and why do I need TV to tell me that? People are hurting here man. Walking out of homes because they can’t pay mortgages, pulling kids out of colleges, stopping medication. Focus on aspects outside financial trouble? Yes, we will, jerkwad! Next time, do this on your own show or write a book or something. “..ways to thrive in this troubling economy....” Ha! Pure noise, my friend, pure noise!
Gloria Borger; senior political commentator or whatever at CNN. IMO, she is senior paraphraser at CNN. I used to watch a lot of CNN during the presidential election period (yes, I suck!) and they had a typical format. Wolf Blitzer or AC or whoever would host a few commentators/analysts and ask them some questions. Those guys will spin the wheel and after watching few news cycles (literally) you will feel like a hamster running in the CNN wheels. Anyway…so say Ed Rollins (another commentator) makes a comment like “Barack Obama is up against a formidable force a.k.a the GOP. He has to be tough and plough his way through it to show the American people his true leadership.” Now that itself is such a load of horse shit but Wolf Blitzer would look at Ms.Borger and go “Gloria?” And she will respond to it with something like this “Obama’s leadership is under test here. The GOP is testing it and they are tough and he has to be tougher. Once he gets out there he is facing the American people and they need to see him as true leader”. Ok now, that sounds good on TV but really is there anything new and valuable added here? Nope. Simply, Noise!
Meet the Press. Not the same anymore. I used to be a huge fan of this show. Used to watch it on TV until they had the podcast out and used to eagerly download it for my Monday AM ride! It was the first talk show I started watching and was a huge fan of Tim Russert. The show is definitely not the same without him. The new guy David Gregory has his own style and it is probably not fair to compare him Russert. But as a viewer, the reasons that brought me back to that show every week are simply not there anymore. Russert was objective and persistent but never really boxed anybody in with his questions. He would tie in many different pieces into his questions and provided a great look into the most pressing issues. I liked the part where he would ask someone “Will you run for President in xxxx?” and keep repeating till they answer. Everyone says No and when they come back after deciding to run he would play the tape from before. It wasn’t “gotcha” at all and was really fun because each of them had a reason as to why they wouldn’t run and how it has changed now for the “greater good”. The show was unique and very classy. It was a fun show and 45 mins or so would just fly by. Gregory is more robotic and scripted I think. Maybe he needs couple years or so to step into this role. I hope so. Until then, that show is just noise. But I am willing to give it a shot so still download and “skim” through it on Mondays.
Except for the AC360 podcast I don’t watch any cable news anymore. I would like to watch Jon Stewart on comedy central but don’t really have the time to watch it on TV (nor do I have cable) and it is not free on podcast. I listen to all the NPR shows on podcast though and I like them. “Wait, wait don’t tell me”, “This American Life”, “Fresh Air”, “Talk of the nation”…All good. Also, listen to 60 minutes podcast, “Real Time with Bill Maher” – all free podcasts on iTunes. My reading has taken a hit due to my podcast listening on the train though. Maybe I should have couple days allocated for reading and not, uhmmm, noise? It is a thought.
Yes, Noise.
Dr.Phil was on AC 360 the other day. I watch AC 360 podcast. It is not great but it is the only video podcast I can get of something I don’t hate. He is better than Lou Dobbs, Larry King, Wolf Blitzer…So anyway, Dr.Phil is on AC360 and Anderson Cooper has already mentioned it couple times that later in the show Dr.Phil is going to give some tips on how we can _thrive_ in this economy. Teeee Teeee Teee…My antennas go up…After few news briefs they break to commercial (which I don’t have to watch on podcast) and just before breaking again says Dr.Phil will share some ideas on how to thrive in this troubling economy. Oh come on, man! Come on!
I should have known better. Dr.Phil comes on air…says troubling economy is an opportunity for us to focus on other things. Like spending time with family, getting to know each other better and focusing on things outside the financial trouble. Ah, is it so? Says the dude making millions of dollars selling BS on television? I do not mean to disrespect any psychiatric treatment here but how is that not common knowledge and why do I need TV to tell me that? People are hurting here man. Walking out of homes because they can’t pay mortgages, pulling kids out of colleges, stopping medication. Focus on aspects outside financial trouble? Yes, we will, jerkwad! Next time, do this on your own show or write a book or something. “..ways to thrive in this troubling economy....” Ha! Pure noise, my friend, pure noise!
Gloria Borger; senior political commentator or whatever at CNN. IMO, she is senior paraphraser at CNN. I used to watch a lot of CNN during the presidential election period (yes, I suck!) and they had a typical format. Wolf Blitzer or AC or whoever would host a few commentators/analysts and ask them some questions. Those guys will spin the wheel and after watching few news cycles (literally) you will feel like a hamster running in the CNN wheels. Anyway…so say Ed Rollins (another commentator) makes a comment like “Barack Obama is up against a formidable force a.k.a the GOP. He has to be tough and plough his way through it to show the American people his true leadership.” Now that itself is such a load of horse shit but Wolf Blitzer would look at Ms.Borger and go “Gloria?” And she will respond to it with something like this “Obama’s leadership is under test here. The GOP is testing it and they are tough and he has to be tougher. Once he gets out there he is facing the American people and they need to see him as true leader”. Ok now, that sounds good on TV but really is there anything new and valuable added here? Nope. Simply, Noise!
Meet the Press. Not the same anymore. I used to be a huge fan of this show. Used to watch it on TV until they had the podcast out and used to eagerly download it for my Monday AM ride! It was the first talk show I started watching and was a huge fan of Tim Russert. The show is definitely not the same without him. The new guy David Gregory has his own style and it is probably not fair to compare him Russert. But as a viewer, the reasons that brought me back to that show every week are simply not there anymore. Russert was objective and persistent but never really boxed anybody in with his questions. He would tie in many different pieces into his questions and provided a great look into the most pressing issues. I liked the part where he would ask someone “Will you run for President in xxxx?” and keep repeating till they answer. Everyone says No and when they come back after deciding to run he would play the tape from before. It wasn’t “gotcha” at all and was really fun because each of them had a reason as to why they wouldn’t run and how it has changed now for the “greater good”. The show was unique and very classy. It was a fun show and 45 mins or so would just fly by. Gregory is more robotic and scripted I think. Maybe he needs couple years or so to step into this role. I hope so. Until then, that show is just noise. But I am willing to give it a shot so still download and “skim” through it on Mondays.
Except for the AC360 podcast I don’t watch any cable news anymore. I would like to watch Jon Stewart on comedy central but don’t really have the time to watch it on TV (nor do I have cable) and it is not free on podcast. I listen to all the NPR shows on podcast though and I like them. “Wait, wait don’t tell me”, “This American Life”, “Fresh Air”, “Talk of the nation”…All good. Also, listen to 60 minutes podcast, “Real Time with Bill Maher” – all free podcasts on iTunes. My reading has taken a hit due to my podcast listening on the train though. Maybe I should have couple days allocated for reading and not, uhmmm, noise? It is a thought.
Sunday, March 22, 2009
Dhak dhak!
I am at my doctor's office and thinking...EKG? What does it stand for? I have heard ECG and that means echo cardiogram. Or maybe the nurse actually said ECG and I heard it as EKG. Would I sound stupid asking what is EKG? Sure I would. Maybe she will ask me to get my IQ checked before the EKG, whatever that is. Why do I need an EKG? What is an EKG anyway?
Wait wait wait...I cannot start here. Going back few weeks.
It is a typical late evening. My daughter is sleeping, my wife is packing my lunch for the next day and inspecting the dish washer that I loaded before switching it on and as for myself, I have moved from a sit upright position to a very reclined position on the couch and from a laser-focused-attention watching Frasier to a semi-slumber state. :) And I had had couple of drinks earlier that evening when my friend stopped by so Mr.Frasier and his friends had no chance against my dozing eyelids. For the record, the "couple drinks earlier" is not part of the "typical" evening.
I am 10 mins or so into my "nap" when the baby monitor placed right next to me relays a mild noise from my daughter. It must be nap or whatever dream I was having but that mild noise felt like a speeding train in my head. I jump out of the couch and take off running up the stairs towards her crib. I reach her crib and find that she just shifted her position and sleeping just fine. At that point, I realize that my heart is pounding. I mean real fast. Boom Boom Boom Boom! So I wanted to lie down a bit and I did. My wife had just witnessed me jump out of the couch and run upstairs like a crazy maniac. Not that it is unusual to see something like this from me, she comes and checks up on me. Seeing me lying in the bed she is like oh no, what happened? I am fine, just wanted to lie down a bit. What? Why? What happened? Take it easy! I am just fine. Oh no, should we go to a doctor? Should I call someone? No, I am fine.
I will fast forward a bit from this point...to the actual doctor's appointment day.
I am five minutes late. The nurse checks me into the consulting room and asks what is wrong. I tell her the story and she goes uh hmm. Have you had such episodes before? Episode? It is not an episode. I ran up the stairs like a crazy maniac and had a sudden rush! No, I did not have any episodes. Good! OK, BP is great, pulse is great, temperature is perfect. Doctor will be here in just a few minutes. Tick tock tick tock. Knock knock. It is the nurse again. Ugh! "The doctor wants to take an EKG. I will be back in couple minutes and explain everything but can you please take your clothes off waist up". Oh boy. Door close.
Knock knock! The nurse walks in, looks at me and goes "I am sorry but we have to shave your chest for better reading". What? Why? Hell no! What is the Eee-K-Geee anyway? So she explained what EKG is and it sounded reasonable why they wanted me to do it. And yes, it is same as ECG! Yes, I knew it!
The little razor comes out and she makes these little patches for the "Stickers" to go. I am probably going to look like Steve Carrell from 40 yr old virgin. The stickers get glued to my skin and some clips get hooked to the stickers. "Try to relax, maybe even a nap, it will help us get a steady reading". Oh yea? Sure. Why not? In the past 10 minutes, I had a complete monologue about EKG, questioned my own IQ level, had to take off my clothes waist up, got patches made on my chest, stickers glued to them and now have wires attached to them. Sure. I can relax. So anyway, the test goes on and it 2-3 minutes it is all done and I can get up, put my clothes back on and wait for the doctor. Nice!
Knock knock! Hey hey hey..how are you buddy?, says the doc. I am good I guess. Given the circumstances. So your heart looks great. BP is perfect and you look fine. So tell me, what happened?. OK, I tell him what happened...the story (I better not catch you yawning Doc!). So the doctor is making notes on his pad. I have no idea what notes he can make from my story. "Two drinks" "ran upstairs like maniac" "wife freaked out"...So few breathing-in breathing-out. Heart sounds great! You are just fine! Yay! "I would tell your wife it is just an adrenaline rush and nothing to worry about. You are fine. Keep working out and doing the things you do. If you have any more such episodes call me and we will run some more tests" No, really, it is not an episode and more tests? Make patches on my chest again? Why not do them while the patches are still uh..available? Alright, thanks doc.
So I tell my wife what the doc said and she seems satisfied. How about the patches? She looks at them and says "hey, like 40 yr old virgin". Yup! That's right.
The end...
As all drug commercials end their "story", so will I. Racing heart beat is no laughing matter and should not to be used by amateur bloggers for the amusement of blogosphere users. Failure to show up at a doc appointment made by your wife may result in loss of meals, sleeping space, any mental peace and in some extreme cases result in change of marital status. Healthy diet and regularly exercising is always important. Live healthy, stay healthy! :)
Wait wait wait...I cannot start here. Going back few weeks.
It is a typical late evening. My daughter is sleeping, my wife is packing my lunch for the next day and inspecting the dish washer that I loaded before switching it on and as for myself, I have moved from a sit upright position to a very reclined position on the couch and from a laser-focused-attention watching Frasier to a semi-slumber state. :) And I had had couple of drinks earlier that evening when my friend stopped by so Mr.Frasier and his friends had no chance against my dozing eyelids. For the record, the "couple drinks earlier" is not part of the "typical" evening.
I am 10 mins or so into my "nap" when the baby monitor placed right next to me relays a mild noise from my daughter. It must be nap or whatever dream I was having but that mild noise felt like a speeding train in my head. I jump out of the couch and take off running up the stairs towards her crib. I reach her crib and find that she just shifted her position and sleeping just fine. At that point, I realize that my heart is pounding. I mean real fast. Boom Boom Boom Boom! So I wanted to lie down a bit and I did. My wife had just witnessed me jump out of the couch and run upstairs like a crazy maniac. Not that it is unusual to see something like this from me, she comes and checks up on me. Seeing me lying in the bed she is like oh no, what happened? I am fine, just wanted to lie down a bit. What? Why? What happened? Take it easy! I am just fine. Oh no, should we go to a doctor? Should I call someone? No, I am fine.
I will fast forward a bit from this point...to the actual doctor's appointment day.
I am five minutes late. The nurse checks me into the consulting room and asks what is wrong. I tell her the story and she goes uh hmm. Have you had such episodes before? Episode? It is not an episode. I ran up the stairs like a crazy maniac and had a sudden rush! No, I did not have any episodes. Good! OK, BP is great, pulse is great, temperature is perfect. Doctor will be here in just a few minutes. Tick tock tick tock. Knock knock. It is the nurse again. Ugh! "The doctor wants to take an EKG. I will be back in couple minutes and explain everything but can you please take your clothes off waist up". Oh boy. Door close.
Knock knock! The nurse walks in, looks at me and goes "I am sorry but we have to shave your chest for better reading". What? Why? Hell no! What is the Eee-K-Geee anyway? So she explained what EKG is and it sounded reasonable why they wanted me to do it. And yes, it is same as ECG! Yes, I knew it!
The little razor comes out and she makes these little patches for the "Stickers" to go. I am probably going to look like Steve Carrell from 40 yr old virgin. The stickers get glued to my skin and some clips get hooked to the stickers. "Try to relax, maybe even a nap, it will help us get a steady reading". Oh yea? Sure. Why not? In the past 10 minutes, I had a complete monologue about EKG, questioned my own IQ level, had to take off my clothes waist up, got patches made on my chest, stickers glued to them and now have wires attached to them. Sure. I can relax. So anyway, the test goes on and it 2-3 minutes it is all done and I can get up, put my clothes back on and wait for the doctor. Nice!
Knock knock! Hey hey hey..how are you buddy?, says the doc. I am good I guess. Given the circumstances. So your heart looks great. BP is perfect and you look fine. So tell me, what happened?. OK, I tell him what happened...the story (I better not catch you yawning Doc!). So the doctor is making notes on his pad. I have no idea what notes he can make from my story. "Two drinks" "ran upstairs like maniac" "wife freaked out"...So few breathing-in breathing-out. Heart sounds great! You are just fine! Yay! "I would tell your wife it is just an adrenaline rush and nothing to worry about. You are fine. Keep working out and doing the things you do. If you have any more such episodes call me and we will run some more tests" No, really, it is not an episode and more tests? Make patches on my chest again? Why not do them while the patches are still uh..available? Alright, thanks doc.
So I tell my wife what the doc said and she seems satisfied. How about the patches? She looks at them and says "hey, like 40 yr old virgin". Yup! That's right.
The end...
As all drug commercials end their "story", so will I. Racing heart beat is no laughing matter and should not to be used by amateur bloggers for the amusement of blogosphere users. Failure to show up at a doc appointment made by your wife may result in loss of meals, sleeping space, any mental peace and in some extreme cases result in change of marital status. Healthy diet and regularly exercising is always important. Live healthy, stay healthy! :)
Friday, March 20, 2009
So All May Eat
I saw this on the NBC nightly news. Pretty remarkable what this couple is doing!
http://www.soallmayeat.org/
And this is what they have to say...
"SAME Cafe is unique in the lack of a set menu as well as set prices. Daily selections are made using fresh, organic ingredients, and funded by the donations of patrons. Instead of a cash register, a donation box is available for one to pay what they felt their meal was worth, or to leave a little more and help out someone less fortunate. If a diner does not have sufficient money to leave, they are encouraged to exchange an hour of service. Our philosophy is that everyone, regardless of economic status, deserves the chance to eat healthy food while being treated with dignity."
Now that's making a difference...
http://www.soallmayeat.org/
And this is what they have to say...
"SAME Cafe is unique in the lack of a set menu as well as set prices. Daily selections are made using fresh, organic ingredients, and funded by the donations of patrons. Instead of a cash register, a donation box is available for one to pay what they felt their meal was worth, or to leave a little more and help out someone less fortunate. If a diner does not have sufficient money to leave, they are encouraged to exchange an hour of service. Our philosophy is that everyone, regardless of economic status, deserves the chance to eat healthy food while being treated with dignity."
Now that's making a difference...
Wednesday, March 18, 2009
Achan
I will never forget the moment I hugged my dad for the last time. We all remember instances but this is different. I remember the exact feeling I had at that moment and the exact emotion I had and the exact words I told him. I have since replayed it in my head so many times that it is more than just a memory. It was in Chennai airport and I was going to board a flight to LA in couple hours or so. I was a little overcome by emotion when I hugged my dad and I remember telling him that it is odd. It is odd that I am finding it very hard to say bye to him when I was ok telling my mom I will see her in couple years. You see, I felt I was my mom’s favorite and my sister is my dad’s favorite. So it was odd that I felt very sad saying goodbye to my dad and was just fine with my mom. Of course I shrugged off that in few minutes and went on…
I never realized how close I was to my dad until I moved out of home to college. Growing up, we had our differences of course. I was a kid and he was an adult.
Of the many memories I have here are few early ones…
I was in 3rd grade when my dad got promoted to…Actually I do not know. I remember him as a sales manager at that time so maybe that is what he got promoted to. He called my mom at home to deliver the news and it was during summer vacation and we (my sister and I) were home. I didn’t really know a lot about promotions but definitely knew it was a very good thing. My mom was overjoyed. To celebrate the occasion I felt I had to present him with something. So I took an old greeting card and carved out some flowers out of it, stuck it to another old greeting card and wrote some really random stuff. With flowers and some more flowers around it. I wish I had saved it because I would get a huge laugh out of seeing it now. Oddly, I remember making the gift and what it looked like but don’t remember how he reacted when I presented it to him. But we went out for dinner to celebrate. Four of us (dad, mom, sister and me) rode on our Bajaj scooter to Blue Diamond. That was the fanciest restaurant I had been to until then and I had a great time.
Every Friday (for the longest time) my dad would take me and my sister to this restaurant (Akmas) for biriyani. It wasn’t a fancy restaurant by any means but the biriyani was great. My sister and I would each get a plate of chicken biriyani and loved it! My dad wouldn’t get anything and just sit there while we finish eating. We never used to “to-go” either. Even mom never came along. It was just us. I don’t remember any conversations we had during those dinners but I vaguely remember him sitting there and watching as we sat and enjoyed the biriyani. He would always ask if it was good and we would nod with our mouth full. In fact, he would ask few times if the biriyani is good. I am not sure why my dad and mom never ate the biriyani along with us. Maybe it wasn’t “budgeted” for 4 people. I do not know but that is probably a good guess. I have never been to that place since then. I do not even know if it exists. Maybe I will check it out next time I visit Chennai. It was in Poonamallee high road, enroute to Aminjikarrai!
My dad worked for Binny Ltd (textile company) and it had a “company club” next to their office. The company club was pretty much deserted except for the “bar man” who ran the bar where I have rarely seen anyone. This was the scene in Chennai (in the 80s). So on second Saturdays we (my sister and I) would accompany my dad to the office and he would drop us off at the company club which was fully equipped with a billiards table, ping pong table, a library (really small room) and a bar. We had unlimited access to the library (phew), ping pong and “cold drinks”, potato chips and peanuts at the bar. I would usually drink a “cold drink” every hour. My dad would get off work at 1ish on Saturdays, sign the bar bill and we would go home. I would have tales of cold drinks and potato chips to tell for the next couple days. My tongue being orange from all the “gold spot” I drank all morning.
World Cup Soccer 1994. Finals.
Robin hood, prince of thieves. Starring Kevin Kostner, releases in 1991. Big hit in
When Doordarshan 2 started airing programs, they were hip and just the idea of having another channel to tune to was amazing! There was this program superhit muqabla which was basically a countdown of top hindi songs. I was a huge fan. J So this was back when we were living in annanagar west in an apartment right next to my aunt’s apartment. My aunt still lives there btw so I have since visited this place several times. I was in high school and should be, like my dad said, walking, talking, sleeping about studies and only thinking about the board exams. J Hardly. So this one night the power goes off an hour before the show and it is almost show time but no sign of power. Strangely, my aunt’s place had power (on a different “phase”) but no TV. Bummer. My dad and my mom aren't home so without heeding to any warnings from my sister, I carry the TV to my aunt’s place to watch the show. Ah, how nice! Too bad my dad didn’t see it that way. He is just mighty pissed when he gets back and finds me go through all this trouble to watch the stupid show. In his opinion, if only I would take the same commitment towards my books, I would be so much better. But the books don’t have “pehla nasha” playing! So as a punishment, he decided to block re-entry of the TV to our house. Meaning, the TV would stay at my aunt’s place and I would not get to watch it. Not sure how long that was the case but I would say couple months or so. My grandma would go to my aunt’s place to watch TV and even tried convincing to my dad but not a chance. I always laugh thinking about that incident now. What I did for superhit muqabla and DD2!
It is 8 years today since he passed away and I miss him in so many different ways. I wish he had visited me here; driven my first car; visited my work place; played with my daughter; stayed at our home; gone out to dinner for my promotion; visited New York; discussed the Obama election with me…yes, my list is long. That list will sit there…and grow as I go on with my life and find a million things I would want to share with him.
Thursday, March 12, 2009
Tendlya!
Last week was what I would call perfect! It was my daughter's first b'day and we had some friends over at our place for a party. It was great to have everyone over and we had a ball!
And...4 of my friends from school days (elementary to high school) were here as well with couple more from college. Wow! I don't think we could have planned a better reunion - it was mostly unplanned. Couple of them made last minute plans to come and another one happens to be in Chicago for work now.
So Saturday night after the party crowd was all gone and the guys went to the basement for some pool, foosball, drinks and yes, Cricket! India vs NZ ODI. India wins the toss and elects to bat. As we sit down with our drinks, shooting the breeze, Tendulkar and Yuvraj display one of the most scintillating batting I have seen in a while (mostly because I haven't watched a lot of cricket lately - mostly following commentary online..sigh sigh).
As the game progressed, Tendulkar gets better and better(u bet) and one of my friends says "dude, this is too perfect. We couldn't ask for anything better." I agreed. It was like going back in memory lane. See, we grew up watching and idolizing the cricket God Tendulkar. (There was a time, I would turn off the TV as soon as Tendulkar gets out. Well, probably the right thing to do considering there was a time when he was the sole contributor to the team.) So to sit there with my buddies from school and watch him at his best was yes, PERFECT!
On a side note, there were several changes; a few being, legal drinking age, receding hairline, "beer belly" and a bunch of kids walking/running/crawling all around!
To Tendulkar! Thanks for making a great reunion, truly remarkable!
And...4 of my friends from school days (elementary to high school) were here as well with couple more from college. Wow! I don't think we could have planned a better reunion - it was mostly unplanned. Couple of them made last minute plans to come and another one happens to be in Chicago for work now.
So Saturday night after the party crowd was all gone and the guys went to the basement for some pool, foosball, drinks and yes, Cricket! India vs NZ ODI. India wins the toss and elects to bat. As we sit down with our drinks, shooting the breeze, Tendulkar and Yuvraj display one of the most scintillating batting I have seen in a while (mostly because I haven't watched a lot of cricket lately - mostly following commentary online..sigh sigh).
As the game progressed, Tendulkar gets better and better(u bet) and one of my friends says "dude, this is too perfect. We couldn't ask for anything better." I agreed. It was like going back in memory lane. See, we grew up watching and idolizing the cricket God Tendulkar. (There was a time, I would turn off the TV as soon as Tendulkar gets out. Well, probably the right thing to do considering there was a time when he was the sole contributor to the team.) So to sit there with my buddies from school and watch him at his best was yes, PERFECT!
On a side note, there were several changes; a few being, legal drinking age, receding hairline, "beer belly" and a bunch of kids walking/running/crawling all around!
To Tendulkar! Thanks for making a great reunion, truly remarkable!
Common cause
During a recent after-few-drinks discussion, I was once again involved in a rather passionate debate related to being Indian.
I would say the general theme of the debate was that Indians do not have a common cause to rally around. How the many states where people are “fighting” for their autonomy have nothing in common to be called one country, India.
I was and am strongly against this idea and I feel compelled to blog about it even after spending my well-earned-whisky-buzz arguing.
Do we need a common cause? Don’t we have many common causes? Isn’t being Indian our “common cause”? Don’t we all cherish our democracy? Don’t we all enjoy the freedom and the right to vote? Don’t we all take great pride in our country’s achievements? Don’t we feel enraged and frustrated when our government fails to act against terrorists? Don’t we feel the pain and suffering of our countrymen suffering due to terrorism, natural disasters, poverty, crime and exploitation? Don’t we celebrate our cricket team beating Pakistan in the T20 finals? Don’t we relish the many different flavors our cuisine offers?
We do. We do. We do….you get the point.
Another line of argument I heard was if one was given the option of being an American citizen rather than an Indian citizen, they would pick the former. Yes, I agree that would most likely be the case. But aren’t we confusing opportunity with patriotism? I think we are. I have put few naturalized citizens to this test by asking a simple question “If India and the united states went to war, who side are you on?” Answer that question for yourself and that should help you separate opportunity from patriotism. It is a pretty extreme question but it makes the point.
Oh here is another argument. States like Assam, Arunachal are forgotten by central government and everybody else so why would they stay in India? Fair argument but when has central government done anything for anybody? India’s recent growth has been in spite of the government (like a friend of mine puts it very well). People who chose to tie their hands to the chairs and wait for central government to untie them are still sitting there or woke up too late. Kerala, my home state, rich in natural resources, intellectuals, education, 100% literacy, water, natural beauty, shipping ports, spices has fallen behind Karnataka, Tamilnadu and Andhra Pradesh because labor unions, communism and protectionism pulled back every time progress was made. I remember my dad telling me how Kerala could have been the “textile capital” of south India or all of India if they had welcomed textile factories instead of protesting at its gates. Else, what is the explanation for Kerala with vast green fertile lands with plentiful rivers, backwaters, lakes, sea and 100% literacy be taken over by Coimbatore and Tiripur in Tamil Nadu?
There I go…digressing again. So closing note to stop my rambling.
We are Indians and love India. Got a more sincere common cause? Jai Hind!
I would say the general theme of the debate was that Indians do not have a common cause to rally around. How the many states where people are “fighting” for their autonomy have nothing in common to be called one country, India.
I was and am strongly against this idea and I feel compelled to blog about it even after spending my well-earned-whisky-buzz arguing.
Do we need a common cause? Don’t we have many common causes? Isn’t being Indian our “common cause”? Don’t we all cherish our democracy? Don’t we all enjoy the freedom and the right to vote? Don’t we all take great pride in our country’s achievements? Don’t we feel enraged and frustrated when our government fails to act against terrorists? Don’t we feel the pain and suffering of our countrymen suffering due to terrorism, natural disasters, poverty, crime and exploitation? Don’t we celebrate our cricket team beating Pakistan in the T20 finals? Don’t we relish the many different flavors our cuisine offers?
We do. We do. We do….you get the point.
Another line of argument I heard was if one was given the option of being an American citizen rather than an Indian citizen, they would pick the former. Yes, I agree that would most likely be the case. But aren’t we confusing opportunity with patriotism? I think we are. I have put few naturalized citizens to this test by asking a simple question “If India and the united states went to war, who side are you on?” Answer that question for yourself and that should help you separate opportunity from patriotism. It is a pretty extreme question but it makes the point.
Oh here is another argument. States like Assam, Arunachal are forgotten by central government and everybody else so why would they stay in India? Fair argument but when has central government done anything for anybody? India’s recent growth has been in spite of the government (like a friend of mine puts it very well). People who chose to tie their hands to the chairs and wait for central government to untie them are still sitting there or woke up too late. Kerala, my home state, rich in natural resources, intellectuals, education, 100% literacy, water, natural beauty, shipping ports, spices has fallen behind Karnataka, Tamilnadu and Andhra Pradesh because labor unions, communism and protectionism pulled back every time progress was made. I remember my dad telling me how Kerala could have been the “textile capital” of south India or all of India if they had welcomed textile factories instead of protesting at its gates. Else, what is the explanation for Kerala with vast green fertile lands with plentiful rivers, backwaters, lakes, sea and 100% literacy be taken over by Coimbatore and Tiripur in Tamil Nadu?
There I go…digressing again. So closing note to stop my rambling.
We are Indians and love India. Got a more sincere common cause? Jai Hind!
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